Tindumhas is a god.

He takes the form of a large, conceited cat.

Tindumhas created everything that exists nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Tindumhas, he will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Tindumhas, he will curse you and those you beget for seventy quadrillion years.

Tindumhas' most sacred site is Ylike in Finland.

Tindumhas' Holy Commandments

1. Never run in the presence of sharks.

2. You must pray to Tindumhas nine times a day.

3. Never think about galaxies.

4. Always help ducks.

5. Never write about evolution by means of natural selection.