Gephiv Kancissmap is a god.

He takes the form of a microscopic, amazing scorpion.

Gephiv Kancissmap created the planet Venus two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Gephiv Kancissmap, he will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Gephiv Kancissmap, he will destroy your home galaxy.

Gephiv Kancissmap's most sacred site is Thethampakkam in India.

Gephiv Kancissmap's Holy Commandments

1. Erect a large aluminium sculpture of Gephiv Kancissmap on top of all buildings.

2. Do not fashion models of living things.

3. Never talk about ducks.

4. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

5. Gephiv Kancissmap must be the most important thing in your life.