Kopgepzen Dinhotvon is a god.

He takes the form of a giant, unthinking fish.

Kopgepzen Dinhotvon created humankind two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Kopgepzen Dinhotvon, he will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Kopgepzen Dinhotvon, he will have a low opinion of you.

Kopgepzen Dinhotvon's most sacred site is Elatos in Greece.

Kopgepzen Dinhotvon's Holy Commandments

1. Put Kopgepzen Dinhotvon first in all things.

2. Do not wear titanium on your body.

3. Worship no other gods but Kopgepzen Dinhotvon.

4. Walk at least six thousand metres per day.

5. Do not covet oxen.