Milkadrill Hakfarn is a god.

She takes the form of a microscopic, flying shrew.

Milkadrill Hakfarn created energy seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Milkadrill Hakfarn, she will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Milkadrill Hakfarn, she will send three marmosets to sort you out.

Milkadrill Hakfarn's most sacred site is Faux Cap in Madagascar.

Milkadrill Hakfarn's Holy Commandments

1. Do not make images of living things.

2. Always make sure there are no whales in a building before entering it.

3. Always pray in complete darkness.

4. Always make a point of helping unfortunate bats.

5. Never sing near tortoises.