Tagbastyattruttgabflabgil is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely heavy, unfair pigeon.

Tagbastyattruttgabflabgil created water seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Tagbastyattruttgabflabgil, he will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Tagbastyattruttgabflabgil, he will jump up and down fuming with rage.

Tagbastyattruttgabflabgil's most sacred site is Auvillar in France.

Tagbastyattruttgabflabgil's Holy Commandments

1. Show mercy to disobedient children.

2. Never write about black holes.

3. Do not covet oxen.

4. Never write about gravity.

5. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.