Quafdinflap is a god.

He takes the form of a giant, unjust skunk.

Quafdinflap created energy three hundred thousand years ago.

If you believe in Quafdinflap, he will approve.

If you do not believe in Quafdinflap, he will send four elderly elephants to rub you out.

Quafdinflap's most sacred site is Manamedu in India.

Quafdinflap's Holy Commandments

1. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

2. Respect your elders.

3. Put Quafdinflap first in all things.

4. Do not listen to music.

5. Worship no other gods but Quafdinflap.