Cutstipmad is a god.

She takes the form of a thin, unfair swan.

Cutstipmad created the Whirlpool Galaxy six billion years ago.

If you believe in Cutstipmad, she will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Cutstipmad, she will sneak up behind you and tap you on the back.

Cutstipmad's most sacred site is Esse in Finland.

Cutstipmad's Holy Commandments

1. Never go into turquoise rooms.

2. You must never eat limes.

3. Put Cutstipmad first in all things.

4. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

5. Always look after injured ants.