Catwegtal is a god.

He takes the form of an exceedingly fat, uncaring goblin.

Catwegtal created energy five million years ago.

If you believe in Catwegtal, he will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Catwegtal, he will hide angry queen hornets in your dwelling place.

Catwegtal's most sacred site is Temmes in Finland.

Catwegtal's Holy Commandments

1. Do not wear black clothing.

2. Look mercifully on unfortunate tortoises.

3. Do not listen to music.

4. Never think ill of sick shrews.

5. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Catwegtal.