Dogbodgannakbossvonk is a god.

It takes the form of an one thousand metre long, egotistical hedgehog.

Dogbodgannakbossvonk created the cosmos three trillion years ago.

If you believe in Dogbodgannakbossvonk, it will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Dogbodgannakbossvonk, it will send two she bears to sort you out.

Dogbodgannakbossvonk's most sacred site is Trujillo in Spain.

Dogbodgannakbossvonk's Holy Commandments

1. Always make sure there are no dogs in a building before entering it.

2. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

3. Pray towards the east.

4. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

5. Never eat green fruit.