Sitfonbellloop Yakominrull is a god.

She takes the form of a nine hundred metre long, narcissistic cobra.

Sitfonbellloop Yakominrull created bats seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Sitfonbellloop Yakominrull, she will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Sitfonbellloop Yakominrull, she will name a particularly small and pointless comet after you.

Sitfonbellloop Yakominrull's most sacred site is Manamedu in India.

Sitfonbellloop Yakominrull's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about amino acids.

2. Run away from mauve horses, for they are unholy.

3. Do not hurt whales.

4. Do not drink water in violet rooms.

5. Sitfonbellloop Yakominrull must be the most important thing in your life.