Xucarmxem is a god.

It takes the form of an exceedingly large, capable dingo.

Xucarmxem created the solar system nine million years ago.

If you believe in Xucarmxem, it will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Xucarmxem, it will hide angry, poisonous snakes in your dwelling place.

Xucarmxem's most sacred site is Yongding in China.

Xucarmxem's Holy Commandments

1. Do not make images of living things.

2. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

3. Always help snakes.

4. Do not bounce in public.

5. Erect a large nickel sculpture of Xucarmxem on top of all buildings.