Wigjinfum is a god.

She takes the form of a three thousand metre long, overgenerous aardvark.

Wigjinfum created the solar system seven million years ago.

If you believe in Wigjinfum, she will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Wigjinfum, she will send three marmosets to sort you out.

Wigjinfum's most sacred site is Maijoma in Mexico.

Wigjinfum's Holy Commandments

1. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Wigjinfum.

2. You must never eat onions.

3. Never sing near mites.

4. Never wear blue dresses.

5. Do not drink alcohol.