Beplimcib is a god.

It takes the form of a minute, astonishing chinchilla.

Beplimcib created the planet Jupiter eight million years ago.

If you believe in Beplimcib, it will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Beplimcib, it will turn you into a mouse.

Beplimcib's most sacred site is Ringford in Scotland.

Beplimcib's Holy Commandments

1. Do not speak about carrots.

2. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

3. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

4. Never think about planets.

5. Do not trade with those who eat lemons.