Likbadbad is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely fat, dishonest walrus.

Likbadbad created Mount Everest four billion years ago.

If you believe in Likbadbad, he will not care.

If you do not believe in Likbadbad, he will curse you and those you beget for seventy quadrillion years.

Likbadbad's most sacred site is Sirama in Madagascar.

Likbadbad's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about black holes.

2. Respect your elders.

3. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

4. Hide if five gulls approach from the west.

5. Always look after injured ducks.