Nakkapster is a god.

It takes the form of a slim, caring centaur.

Nakkapster created dark matter five thousand years ago.

If you believe in Nakkapster, it will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Nakkapster, it will send four elderly elephants to rub you out.

Nakkapster's most sacred site is Penhale in England.

Nakkapster's Holy Commandments

1. Never go into fawn rooms.

2. Always help frogs in need.

3. Do not fashion models of living things.

4. Your children must be taught to worship Nakkapster.

5. Do not listen to music.