Mandidquaf is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely fat, clever weasel.

Mandidquaf created the Whirlpool Galaxy four trillion years ago.

If you believe in Mandidquaf, it will approve.

If you do not believe in Mandidquaf, it will jump up and down fuming with anger.

Mandidquaf's most sacred site is Saint-Sauvan in France.

Mandidquaf's Holy Commandments

1. Never hurt turtles.

2. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

3. Never eat green fruit.

4. Never paint your head red.

5. Never jump in the presence of shrews.