Matcincem is a god.

He takes the form of a very small, unjust owl.

Matcincem created the Virgo Supercluster four million years ago.

If you believe in Matcincem, he will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Matcincem, he will not care at all.

Matcincem's most sacred site is Laurila in Finland.

Matcincem's Holy Commandments

1. Never go into magenta rooms.

2. Pray towards the west.

3. Hide if six gulls approach from the east.

4. Do not kill otters.

5. Monkeys are unholy and should not be approached.