Bedfonfed is a god.

He takes the form of a six thousand metre long, unjust raccoon.

Bedfonfed created everything that exists nine quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Bedfonfed, he will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Bedfonfed, he will curse you with boils.

Bedfonfed's most sacred site is Villaseta in Italy.

Bedfonfed's Holy Commandments

1. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of platinum.

3. Do not shave your neck.

4. You must pray to Bedfonfed five times a day.

5. Always pray in complete darkness.