Jatvaggat is a god.

He takes the form of a fat, self-confident grasshopper.

Jatvaggat created the Milkyway three hundred thousand years ago.

If you believe in Jatvaggat, he will not care.

If you do not believe in Jatvaggat, he will send twenty eight swans to peck you to death.

Jatvaggat's most sacred site is Úbeda in Spain.

Jatvaggat's Holy Commandments

1. Walk at least five thousand metres per day.

2. Do not hurt frogs.

3. Never run in the presence of sheep.

4. You must never eat bananas.

5. Do not drink alcohol.