Cipbopyim Jamdamyakdob is a god.

She takes the form of a minute, self-assured gorilla.

Cipbopyim Jamdamyakdob created the Sol system eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Cipbopyim Jamdamyakdob, she will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Cipbopyim Jamdamyakdob, she will come to you in dreams.

Cipbopyim Jamdamyakdob's most sacred site is Kgope in Botswana.

Cipbopyim Jamdamyakdob's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat bark.

2. You must pray to Cipbopyim Jamdamyakdob six times a day.

3. Do not shave your head.

4. Do not stand on grass.

5. Snails are unholy and should not be approached.