Hatmisnurtmad is a god.

It takes the form of a six thousand metre long, narcissistic finch.

Hatmisnurtmad created an up quark three trillion years ago.

If you believe in Hatmisnurtmad, it will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Hatmisnurtmad, it will have a very low opinion of you.

Hatmisnurtmad's most sacred site is Burras in England.

Hatmisnurtmad's Holy Commandments

1. Do not listen to music.

2. Never write about the inheritance of acquired characteristics.

3. Never talk about gravity.

4. You must never eat peanuts.

5. Put Hatmisnurtmad first in all things.