Yakcidcutlun is a god.

It takes the form of a five thousand metre long, compassionate squirrel.

Yakcidcutlun created an atom eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Yakcidcutlun, it will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Yakcidcutlun, it will attempt to scare you with thunder.

Yakcidcutlun's most sacred site is Karikalampakkam in India.

Yakcidcutlun's Holy Commandments

1. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

2. Never look at black holes.

3. Always help sick grasshopers.

4. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

5. Never eat green fruit.