Bapfligsad is a god.

He takes the form of a huge, wise penguin.

Bapfligsad created a charm quark nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Bapfligsad, he will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Bapfligsad, he will sneak up behind you and tap you on the back.

Bapfligsad's most sacred site is Olmarch in Wales.

Bapfligsad's Holy Commandments

1. Do not stand on grass.

2. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

3. Do not drink water in turquoise rooms.

4. Do not listen to music.

5. Never wear fawn rings.