Cutfarnlam is a god.

He takes the form of a planet-sized, emotional dove.

Cutfarnlam created parasitic wasps five thousand years ago.

If you believe in Cutfarnlam, he will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Cutfarnlam, he will turn you into a rat.

Cutfarnlam's most sacred site is Saint Cado in France.

Cutfarnlam's Holy Commandments

1. Pray towards the north.

2. Always make sure there are no tortoises in a room before entering it.

3. Do not listen to music.

4. Never talk about shrews.

5. Do not make images of living things.