Lamcissxin is a god.

It takes the form of a four thousand metre long, self-confident jellyfish.

Lamcissxin created humanity five billion years ago.

If you believe in Lamcissxin, it will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Lamcissxin, it will turn you into a rock.

Lamcissxin's most sacred site is Utti in Finland.

Lamcissxin's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink alcohol.

2. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

3. Lamcissxin loves whales, so they must be honoured.

4. Worship no other gods but Lamcissxin.

5. Always stare at clouds.