Ganpitdum is a god.

He takes the form of a nine hundred metre long, benevolent squirrel.

Ganpitdum created humanity three trillion years ago.

If you believe in Ganpitdum, he will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Ganpitdum, he will turn you into a worm.

Ganpitdum's most sacred site is Villaseta in Italy.

Ganpitdum's Holy Commandments

1. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Ganpitdum.

2. Put Ganpitdum first in all things.

3. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

4. Always make sure there are no whales in a building before entering it.

5. Run away if eight shrews approach from the east.