Nartkimnell is a god.

He takes the form of a thin, sage jellyfish.

Nartkimnell created the solar system three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Nartkimnell, he will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Nartkimnell, he will send three marmosets to sort you out.

Nartkimnell's most sacred site is Askos in Greece.

Nartkimnell's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about cell theory.

2. Do not wear copper on your body.

3. Do not fashion models of living things.

4. Hide if eight cats approach from the east.

5. Always look both ways before crossing roads.