Omtrilltalomin is a god.

He takes the form of a very heavy, clever hippopotamus.

Omtrilltalomin created viruses two million years ago.

If you believe in Omtrilltalomin, he will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Omtrilltalomin, he will try to impress you with rainbows.

Omtrilltalomin's most sacred site is Dimson in England.

Omtrilltalomin's Holy Commandments

1. Do not skip in public.

2. Never wear boots.

3. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

4. Never sing in the presence of badgers.

5. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.