Teencubnul is a god.

It takes the form of a massive, flying alligator.

Teencubnul created the Small Magellanic Cloud five billion years ago.

If you believe in Teencubnul, it will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Teencubnul, it will jump up and down fuming with anger.

Teencubnul's most sacred site is Cobbelsdorf in Germany.

Teencubnul's Holy Commandments

1. Never pour water over plants.

2. Teencubnul loves tapirs, so they must be respected.

3. Respect your elders.

4. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

5. Always stare at clouds.