Arpbosshuggabhugmatcum is a god.

It takes the form of a very large, staggering hyena.

Arpbosshuggabhugmatcum created time and space three hundred thousand years ago.

If you believe in Arpbosshuggabhugmatcum, it will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Arpbosshuggabhugmatcum, it will attempt to scare you with earthquakes.

Arpbosshuggabhugmatcum's most sacred site is Leswalt in Scotland.

Arpbosshuggabhugmatcum's Holy Commandments

1. Always help cats.

2. You must love Arpbosshuggabhugmatcum.

3. Never sit near mice.

4. Never think ill of sick geese.

5. You must pray to Arpbosshuggabhugmatcum four times a day.