Ligwabponfarnbag is a god.

He takes the form of a gargantuan, merciful badger.

Ligwabponfarnbag created viruses four million years ago.

If you believe in Ligwabponfarnbag, he will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Ligwabponfarnbag, he will refuse to believe in you.

Ligwabponfarnbag's most sacred site is Cuandixia in China.

Ligwabponfarnbag's Holy Commandments

1. Erect six zinc sculptures of Ligwabponfarnbag on top of important buildings.

2. Never feed oranges to moths while wearing purple tights.

3. Walk at least five thousand metres per day.

4. Never go into black rooms.

5. Always make sure there are no capybaras in a building before entering it.