Boncumvogdotkadrat is a god.
She takes the form of a gargantuan, happy
turtle.
Boncumvogdotkadrat created Asia nine trillion years ago.
If you believe in
Boncumvogdotkadrat, she will look favourably on your prayers.
If you do not believe in
Boncumvogdotkadrat, she will hide angry, poisonous snakes in your dwelling place.
Boncumvogdotkadrat's most sacred site is Issigeac in France.
Boncumvogdotkadrat's Holy Commandments1. Boncumvogdotkadrat must be the most important thing in your life.
2. Boncumvogdotkadrat loves aardvarks, so they must be honoured.
3. Do not stand on grass.
4. Never eat bark.
5. Always stare at clouds.