Henbemfetcem is a god.

It takes the form of a seven thousand metre long, clever walrus.

Henbemfetcem created silver three trillion years ago.

If you believe in Henbemfetcem, it will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Henbemfetcem, it will destroy your favourite planet.

Henbemfetcem's most sacred site is Thimmanaickenpalayam in India.

Henbemfetcem's Holy Commandments

1. Hide if nine tortoises approach from the west.

2. Never eat cherries.

3. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

4. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

5. Always look after injured turtles.