Pakkopjig is a god.

She takes the form of a very small, annoying spider.

Pakkopjig created the Tadpole Galaxy four trillion years ago.

If you believe in Pakkopjig, she will be happy.

If you do not believe in Pakkopjig, she will boil you in a big pot.

Pakkopjig's most sacred site is Buskerud in Norway.

Pakkopjig's Holy Commandments

1. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

2. Always make sure there are no foxes in a building before entering it.

3. Never play with disobedient children.

4. Never write about cell theory.

5. Always look both ways before crossing roads.