Vollapwab is a god.

He takes the form of a six thousand metre long, quiet coyote.

Vollapwab created the Large Magellanic Cloud eight billion years ago.

If you believe in Vollapwab, he will be surprised.

If you do not believe in Vollapwab, he will turn you into a giant snail.

Vollapwab's most sacred site is Pandamatenga in Botswana.

Vollapwab's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about the strong nuclear force.

2. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Vollapwab.

3. You must never eat aubergines.

4. Do not drink water in yellow rooms.

5. Do not drink alcohol.