Kipnurlbeg is a god.

He takes the form of a four thousand metre long, resourceful faun.

Kipnurlbeg created the planet Venus two billion years ago.

If you believe in Kipnurlbeg, he will be happy.

If you do not believe in Kipnurlbeg, he will not invite you to parties.

Kipnurlbeg's most sacred site is Yongding in China.

Kipnurlbeg's Holy Commandments

1. Always help mice.

2. Always make sure there are no doves in a room before entering it.

3. Do not commit murder.

4. Erect a large silicon sculpture of Kipnurlbeg on top of all buildings.

5. Put Kipnurlbeg first in all things.