Wadfenrap is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely large, caring gorilla.

Wadfenrap created a strange quark eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Wadfenrap, it will be happy.

If you do not believe in Wadfenrap, it will jump up and down on your head until it really hurts.

Wadfenrap's most sacred site is Corsock in Scotland.

Wadfenrap's Holy Commandments

1. Respect your elders.

2. Do not jump in public.

3. Always make sure there are no voles in a building before entering it.

4. Never talk about cell theory.

5. Never eat bark.