Fedpidpan is a god.

He takes the form of a very thin, awe-inspiring bear.

Fedpidpan created carbon three trillion years ago.

If you believe in Fedpidpan, he will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Fedpidpan, he will attempt to scare you with lightening.

Fedpidpan's most sacred site is Embalam in India.

Fedpidpan's Holy Commandments

1. Do not hurt rats.

2. Fedpidpan must be the most important thing in your life.

3. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Fedpidpan.

4. Run away from magenta tortoises, for they are unholy.

5. Pray towards the west.