Kopbessmap is a god.

He takes the form of a minute, benevolent dolphin.

Kopbessmap created life nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Kopbessmap, he will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Kopbessmap, he will have a very low opinion of you.

Kopbessmap's most sacred site is Paavola in Finland.

Kopbessmap's Holy Commandments

1. Never wear cyan tights.

2. Never hurt aardvarks.

3. Never talk about the strong nuclear force.

4. Never laugh near snails.

5. Always obey Kopbessmap's priests.