Bonkwigfet is a god.

He takes the form of a four hundred metre long, omnipotent octopus.

Bonkwigfet created a bottom quark two years ago.

If you believe in Bonkwigfet, he will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Bonkwigfet, he will destroy your favourite planet.

Bonkwigfet's most sacred site is Burras in England.

Bonkwigfet's Holy Commandments

1. Never laugh in the presence of capybaras.

2. Never talk about fire.

3. Never think about gravity.

4. Never pour water over plants.

5. Put Bonkwigfet first in all things.