Donbigjarnmip is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely large, fast snail.

Donbigjarnmip created humanity six quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Donbigjarnmip, she will celebrate by creating some nebulas.

If you do not believe in Donbigjarnmip, she will turn you into a dog.

Donbigjarnmip's most sacred site is Miiluranta in Finland.

Donbigjarnmip's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink water in pink rooms.

2. Do not hurt frogs.

3. Never think about evolution by means of natural selection.

4. Never eat lentils.

5. Do not drink alcohol.