Bathitvig is a god.

It takes the form of a fat, moody mouse.

Bathitvig created snails seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Bathitvig, it will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Bathitvig, it will send three marmosets to sort you out.

Bathitvig's most sacred site is Grimme in Germany.

Bathitvig's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

2. Do not wear aluminium on your body.

3. Do not drink water in violet rooms.

4. Hide if six otters approach from the south.

5. Do not chop down trees.