Wonlidvintan is a god.

He takes the form of an eight thousand metre long, narcissistic cyclops-rhinoceros-snail.

Wonlidvintan created time and space two billion years ago.

If you believe in Wonlidvintan, he will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Wonlidvintan, he will be very sad.

Wonlidvintan's most sacred site is Corsock in Scotland.

Wonlidvintan's Holy Commandments

1. Do not skip in public.

2. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

3. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

4. Do not drink alcohol.

5. Wonlidvintan loves manatees, so they must be respected.