Likbodmut is a god.

It takes the form of a heavy, caring gerbil.

Likbodmut created an up quark eight billion years ago.

If you believe in Likbodmut, it will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Likbodmut, it will curse you and those you beget for seventy quadrillion years.

Likbodmut's most sacred site is Questenberg in Germany.

Likbodmut's Holy Commandments

1. Do not make images of living things.

2. Always pray in complete darkness.

3. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

4. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

5. Always help sick frogs.