Kondagfeb Gupfobbarn is a god.

He takes the form of a gargantuan, caring hare.

Kondagfeb Gupfobbarn created a photon two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Kondagfeb Gupfobbarn, he will be surprised.

If you do not believe in Kondagfeb Gupfobbarn, he will jump up and down on your head until it really hurts.

Kondagfeb Gupfobbarn's most sacred site is Romlund in Denmark.

Kondagfeb Gupfobbarn's Holy Commandments

1. Always stare at clouds.

2. Never talk about cell theory.

3. Never talk about planets.

4. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

5. Walk at least three thousand metres per day.