Flagmin is a god.

It takes the form of a small, awe-inspiring tapir.

Flagmin created an electron seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Flagmin, it will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Flagmin, it will remove you from existence.

Flagmin's most sacred site is Skive in Denmark.

Flagmin's Holy Commandments

1. Never feed peas to bats while wearing brown shorts.

2. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

3. Do not wear gray clothing.

4. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

5. Never talk about aardvarks.