Xenditkarlipdaptunsand is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely heavy, pitiless donkey.

Xenditkarlipdaptunsand created Asia eight million years ago.

If you believe in Xenditkarlipdaptunsand, it will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Xenditkarlipdaptunsand, it will turn you into a mole.

Xenditkarlipdaptunsand's most sacred site is Goat's Hole Cave in England.

Xenditkarlipdaptunsand's Holy Commandments

1. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

2. Erect a large platinum sculpture of Xenditkarlipdaptunsand on top of all buildings.

3. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Xenditkarlipdaptunsand.

4. Fast once a month.

5. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.