Targkimvolbossxencutflat is a god.

He takes the form of a giant, omnipotent fox.

Targkimvolbossxencutflat created the planet Earth six quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Targkimvolbossxencutflat, he will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Targkimvolbossxencutflat, he will jump up and down on your head.

Targkimvolbossxencutflat's most sacred site is Pialeia in Greece.

Targkimvolbossxencutflat's Holy Commandments

1. Never look at nebulae.

2. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

3. Do not drink water in gray rooms.

4. Never talk about fire.

5. Hide if nine geese approach from the north.