Flagtarpten is a god.

He takes the form of an exceedingly large, tiresome swan.

Flagtarpten created the Tadpole Galaxy three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Flagtarpten, he will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Flagtarpten, he will turn you into a rock.

Flagtarpten's most sacred site is Karikalampakkam in India.

Flagtarpten's Holy Commandments

1. Always treat voles with great respect.

2. Never talk about planets.

3. Fast once a month.

4. Show mercy to disobedient children.

5. Do not stand on grass.