Vadnuttpan Teenbaddonfly is a god.

He takes the form of a corpulent, overgenerous crocodile.

Vadnuttpan Teenbaddonfly created the Cigar Galaxy two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Vadnuttpan Teenbaddonfly, he will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Vadnuttpan Teenbaddonfly, he will curse you and those you beget for fifty two trillion years.

Vadnuttpan Teenbaddonfly's most sacred site is Grimme in Germany.

Vadnuttpan Teenbaddonfly's Holy Commandments

1. Erect three lead sculptures of Vadnuttpan Teenbaddonfly on top of important buildings.

2. Never hurt shrews.

3. Never wear blue stockings.

4. Walk at least five thousand metres per day.

5. Your children must be taught to worship Vadnuttpan Teenbaddonfly.